


One More Night

by harrysbun



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-21
Updated: 2014-09-21
Packaged: 2018-02-18 05:45:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2337368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harrysbun/pseuds/harrysbun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The stress is too much for Harry and Louis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One More Night

**Author's Note:**

> this was sort of a late night thing, so sorry if it's shitty
> 
> xx

"Thank you all for coming out, we've been One Direction and we hope you have a safe drive home and we'll see you all later!" The screams that erupt after well rehearsed goodbye from Zayn deafen the five guys, reminding them all so much why they love their job. They run off the large stage, giving one last wave to the huge crowd, making the screams go even louder, and then they're bombarded with their team, handing them their mics and ear pieces and empty water bottles and everything else they have in their hands.  
Harry looks over at Louis involuntarily when the team clears out, seeing him messing with his fringe in the random mirror hanging on the wall. It really shouldn't be this hard; seeing him do something so _normal_ like fixing his hair. But it's been weeks since they've talked, which is a real fucking accomplishment considering they've been on tour and in the same bus for hours on end. Louis' eyes suddenly catch his in the mirror, fingers stopping in his damp hair. And it's hard for Harry to look away, but he has to and he does, turning away from him entirely and walking to the back door, waiting for the rest of the boys so they can walk out to the bus.  
"Come on lads, we're driving thirteen hours tonight!" Paul shouts, probably not loud enough considering the buzz of energy all the boys besides Harry seem to have.  
"Did you see that girl's sign, Harry?" Niall cackles, coming up to him and punching his arm, rather hard.  
"Erm. Which one?" he grumbles, running a hand over the stinging part of his arm.  
" _Spit on me, Harry_!" Niall laughs. "Can you believe that? _Spit_ on me!"  
Harry just smiles warily, like he has been for a good two months as Zayn comes up and drapes an arm around Harry's shoulders.  
"You lads ready?" Paul asks them, hand on the door. When he opens it, the sounds of screams fill their ears from people still going at it in the dome. And Harry usually would tweet something, rile them up some more or even beg the lads to all do it, too, just to hear them scream louder. But right now, he's really not in the mood to do much except sleep. He does wish it was in a hotel room, though, and that the next show wasn't so close to this one that they could. It's not so easy sleeping in the bunks.  
"Are any of you going to the other lad's bus? Or are you all staying in this one?" Paul asks, as they walk, seeing both busses on. They all mumble "no" which makes Harry's stomach flip because that means thirteen hours of possibly staring at Louis sleep on the couch or play FIFA or eat something unhealthy. He knows it's bad for him, to want to see him do all those things. It's not going to make the transition of boyfriends to not boyfriends any easier.  
They pile on the bus, happy that it's just them on the bus because Gem and Lottie are staying at a hotel and the band on the other bus. It's rare that they get it like this, just the five of them in the bus to buzz off each other's energy. It almost feels like old times, even. Back when they were doing the Up All Night tour and it was just them. Those days were easier and it'd be a lie for them to say that they don't miss it.  
"The show was pretty loud tonight, huh lads?" Liam beams. He beams for literally six hours straight after shows.  
"Yeah, it really was," Louis mumbles, getting a beer from the mini fridge and taking his shirt off, tossing it to the bunk section of the bus. Harry's eyes go anywhere but on him as they all undresses and redress, even settling to look at Niall because looking at anyone and anything is easier than looking at Louis. The bus starts moving once they all get settled back into the back room of the bus with comfier clothes on, three of them piling on the couch and Niall and Zayn on the floor, switching on the PS3 console.  
This is a routine, Harry's used to it. They do a show, they get on the bus, they change, they drink a couple beers, they play FIFA and they talk and talk about the show, going on and on about how loud it was and how great the crowd was and giving it a rating on the list of the loudest shows. It's always been this way, ever since they started doing tours. Really, the only thing different is that Louis isn't snuggled on Harry's lap with his face tucked into his neck whilst whispering sweet nothing and pressing soft little kisses to Harry's skin. And even though it's the only thing, it makes everything significantly different.  
"I'm going to bed," Harry says after a while, not being able to look at Louis with his already bitten off nails in between his teeth and his hair now pushed back with a headband.  
"C'mon Harry, hang out a little longer," Zayn says from the floor, eyes never leaving the screen.  
"I'm not feeling very well," he lies, eyes flicking to Louis one last time before he stands. And the boys don't push him because they know. Everyone knows, really. They know that Harry and Louis aren't going to be the same and they're beginning to realise that there's nothing they can do to help; they've tried and failed and that's all there is to it.  
So when they all see Harry disappear into a bunk and pull back the sheet to cover himself up, Niall pauses the game and they all turn to Louis, who finally is able to let his tears out as he shoves his face into the fabric on Liam's shirt. The boys exchange looks before pressing play on the game again and just allowing their two best friends to be heartbroken because there's absolutely nothing they can do.  
-  
The boys have a six day break after three more shows, and usually Harry'd go to LA, spend time with Paige or Ben. But Nick called him two nights ago, inviting him to some club for someone or another's birthday tonight. It's been a while since Harry's seen Nick, or even his mum, so he just agreed, London seeming like a nice place to go at the moment. A lot less paps.  
When Harry walks into his cold London place, he immediately showers, puts on some clothes from his duffle and grabs a random set of keys from the holder and it out just as quickly as he was in. It's been a while since he's been back to his place in London. In fact, the last time he was here was with Louis. They had a Harry Potter movie marathon that led to some soft, sweet sex with cuddles afterwords and the memory makes Harry's heart break all over again.  
He drives to Nick's flat, not even bothering to knock as he walks in, grimacing as he sees him snogging some bloke on the couch. He sees Harry, gives him a sly wink before going back to his previous actions. He just rolls his eyes, shuffling into Nick's room and raiding his closet for a flannel, thinking Zayn probably borrowed his and forgot to give it back. And when he finds one and puts it on, rolling up the sleeves since they're too short anyways, he sees Nick, pink cheeked and flustered leaning against the doorway.  
"Hiya Harry," he says, breathless. "You kind of ruined my chance at a shag."  
"Don't see how, I'm pretty sure you would have kept on even if I hadn't left the room," Harry shrugs, not really liking how Nick is looking at him. Sure he knows Nick always tries to get at him, but he's a really good friend and chooses to pretend not to notice. It's gotten significantly worse since he and Louis broke up, though.  
"Of course not, Harry. You're too distracting," he winks at him again and moves closer. Harry dodges whatever it was that was coming, giving a smirk hoping that'll suffice as he gets to the doorway.  
"Hurry up and get dressed, I didn't come all the way down here to watch you snog someone," Harry patronises jokingly, really just needing an excuse to get out of this flat and go _do_ something. It's been forever since he's been able to do something and know that there's a possibility he might be able to have fun. 

The club is loud and dingy and dark and everything Harry needs it to be. He hasn't been in a club for months, hasn't been able to feel stranger's hands on him in so long that it's all just liberating. He snogs a girl in the back corner of the room, pushing her against the wall with his hips as she sucks a bruise onto the base of his neck. And he tries to really not think about it, not knowing what emotion will come over him if he lets himself really think about how the lips on his aren't Louis' and that the bruise on his neck won't be from the person he really wants it to be from. And when he takes her back to his place and fucks her into the mattress, he really doesn't allow himself to think about how he came with a vision of Louis, sweaty and panting underneath him. 

Harry's mum doesn't ask about the love bite on his neck, though Harry knows she noticed it. He doesn't think he'll be able to handle telling his mum about the girl he shagged last night and how it wasn't Louis. She just gives him a warm smile and hugs him hard, the gesture saying _I'm here if you want to talk,_. And Harry doesn't want to talk about it, so he just gives her a look before pressing a kiss to her cheek.  
"Is Gemma back?" he opts for, making his mum's expression fall because she really wants Harry to talk to her, to talk to anyone really.  
"Yeah, she's on her way. Would you like some tea, honey?"  
"That'd be lovely, mum," he smiles at her in the soft way, finding it odd that he's the one that has to make her feel better about all this. Harry's never been particularly good with how he feels, especially when it comes to how hurt he is, so he doesn't know why she's surprised. Anne just nods and scurries off into the kitchen, clutching her robe tighter to her body.  
And as Harry walks through the foyer to follow his mum, he sees the picture of he and Louis in Leeds Fest he sent to her, all those years ago, hanging up in its usual spot on the wall. The memory of the story behind the photo makes his heart clench and his eyes water but he doesn't let his mum see, knowing for a fact that she's going to want to talk about how relationships aren't easy and that he shouldn't have let Louis go without a fight and that they should have stuck it out because they're _soul mates_. Have been ever since that night in Leeds and always will be. But it's not simple anymore, it's tiring as hell and takes so much out of the both of them.  
"I'm okay," Harry assures her once she catches him staring at the photo, giving her a lopsided grin. "I really am." Even though he's not.  
-  
The boys have a show in Chicago after their break. And when they all see each other in the hotel lobby after six days, they hug, each and every one of them. Even Harry and Louis, but only for a second before it gets too much for them both and they pull away, going in to hug someone else to get the pain to go away. It doesn't work, though. The entire fifteenth floor is rented out for them, being that they have double shows here and have to spend four nights here rather than one, maybe two. And they all have their own room which is nice. The only thing that makes Harry nervous is his and Louis' are right next door to each other. And he knows from past experiences with the other lads, that the walls are thin. And now he can't even think about getting a shag in because he just doesn't think that'd be right; to have Louis be able to hear what he's doing next door.  
It's Harry's escape really, and he doesn't know how to go four days without it. He'll go mad. He can't sit and deal with the fact that Louis is next door when he'd rather him be next to him in bed. He needs to do _something_ and that something is a busty blonde, just so he can feel alright about himself. Maybe Liam will switch rooms with him when he sneaks a girl in. He knows he will, he's done it for Niall loads of times when his room is right next to Gem's or Lottie's or summat. The boy's got some class.  
"You've got an hour, and then we have to head to the stadium," Paul informs them all even though none are really listening. The boys just head to their rooms, probably going in for a short nap or a shower or in Harry's case, a wank. He's become extremely horny lately and theres nothing he can do about it besides groan into his arm or pillow out of courtesy of his ex boyfriend right next door. And if he's being completely honest, he doesn't think he can get off to someone else with Louis next door. It doesn't seem possible.  
When Harry comes, it's with an accidental shout of Louis' name that he hopes he didn't hear. 

Once the show ended that night, Harry called his friend Kat, a redhead who he met last year at a party who tried to snog him in the dingy bathroom. Louis decided to walk in on that time, giving her a look and then grabbing Harry by the neck and kissing him hard, hopping up on the counter and undoing Harry's belt and trousers.  
She shows up thirty minutes later, immediately throwing her arms around Harry's neck and kissing him; her hair stair in her lipgloss and making the kiss a bit weird but Harry doesn't object, just let's it all happen, glad Louis is out with Zayn and not in the room next door when he finds out that Kat is very, _very_ vocal. 

After the second show, they all pile into Liam's room, the telly on with the scent of fags burning into Harry's nostrils. He hates cigarettes so much and he would say that it's the one thing he hates most in the world but the one thing he hates more is seeing Louis smoke. Especially since he recently quit, when Harry begged and begged him to. And now, seeing him pick up the nasty, dangerous habit, it makes Harry so angry. And it makes him even _angrier_ when Eleanor walks in, saying hi to all the boys except Harry and then plopping down on the couch next to Louis.  
Harry knows that Louis must have called her over, because they're not scheduled to hang out until tomorrow afternoon. Louis never wants to spend unnecessary time with her. And when the sound of lips on lips fill his ears from behind him, all he can think of his how _fucked_ up that is. Eleanor is nothing more than a distraction and now that there's nothing to distract, she doesn't need to be here, especially in a private place with four guys who know that Louis is _gay_. And Harry doesn't blame her, really. He blames Louis because he knows it's intentional, that he's just trying to hurt him.  
"Fuck this," Harry grumbles, abandoning his beer bottle on the floor as he leaves the room, angrily walking to his own. And he doesn't even realise that he's crying until hot tears soak his shirt. He doesn't know how Louis can do that, how he can just kiss someone else knowing that Harry is a foot away. Sure they've been broken up for a little over a month, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care; that he doesn't still cry over him at night and that he doesn't still love him with all his heart.  
As Harry turns around, shucking his shirt off, he sees Louis, leaning against the closed door with a cautious look on his face, his bottom lip sucked between his teeth.  
"Get the fuck out," Harry spits. And it sucks that those are the first words Harry's said to him since the night they broke up, but he doesn't know what else to say, how to get the point across without saying so.  
"Harry," is all Louis says; his expression something that Harry's come to know is the one he wears when he _knows_ he's done something wrong.  
"Don't. Get out, Louis, I'm serious," and Harry really is serious, he can't look at him right now. It's just going to break him down more.  
"Harry- what did.. what did you expect me to do? Just let you.." he runs his hands through his hair, exasperated, lost of words.  
"Don't blame this on me, what the fuck, Louis?" Louis blanches, like he always does when Harry's voice raises.  
"But it is! You make me so-"  
"So what? What did I fucking do to have you just snog with someone, _her_ of all people, with me right there!"  
"You fucked that girl, Harry!" he shouts, coming up to Harry and pushing weakly at his chest. "I was _right next door_ , how the hell do you think I felt, hearing you guys!"  
Harry freezes, eyes widening as he sees Louis all teary-eyed and blotchy cheeks and he feels awful.  
"Lou, I didn't-"  
"Oh save it," Louis cuts him off, wiping under his eyes because he feels stupid for crying; it's not his fault.  
"I didn't know you were here, Lou, Niall said you went out with Zayn. I wouldn't- with you next door- I couldn't," Harry rambles, hands involuntary reaching for Louis' small ones. Louis just pulls away.  
"But you did it," he insists, glaring, "and the fucking hickey you have on your neck from last week shows that you've done it more than once."  
"That's not fair," Harry shakes his head. "We're not together."  
"And whose fault is that?" Louis scoffs.  
"It's no one's fault, Louis, Christ. We've just.. grown apart. We're not the same kids we were four years ago, Lou," Harry sighs, finally getting it off his chest. Louis didn't give him the chance to explain the night he told Louis they needed a break for a while; just left the room.  
"Don't include me in your excuses Harry," Louis huffs, crying even harder. "You don't want me anymore, I get it. But don't give me the whole 'I was just a kid' shit."  
"You can fuck right off if you think I don't want you anymore," Harry snaps, eyes narrowing and fists clenching. That's the stupidest thing Louis has ever said because everyone in the damn world _knows_ that Harry will always want Louis, no matter what.  
"If you want me, then nothing else should matter!" Louis tiny hands ball into fists as he punches at Harry, feebly as more tears fall down his cheeks, blurring his vision. Harry just lets him, Louis' punches resembling the punches of an angry five year old.  
"Lou," Harry says.  
"No, don't. If you want me, then you shouldn't have fucking _left_ me, Harry. Yeah, it's not easy, but it's so much harder to not have you next to me at night when things get rough," he cries, punches ceasing, instead focusing on keeping his breathing even and sobs under control.  
"Louis," is all Harry can think to say. "I can't- it's hard to stay away from you, when they make me. I can't stand to have to be fucking _careful_ with my own boyfriend. It's just.. it'd just be easier to-" he stops talking, seeing Louis face fall even farther.  
"It'd be easier if we weren't together," Louis finishes, bottom lip jutting out.  
"That sounds worse than it's meaning to be," Harry breathes, hand coming up to cup Louis' cheek gently. And he half expects him to push him off, but he only just leans into the touch. "I just don't want the limitations. I want to be able to do this with you, talk to you, touch you whenever I want."  
"And we can't right now," Louis prompts.  
"Yeah. And I just think it'd be easier to not be with you at all than have to hide who we are," Harry sighs, feeling incredibly happy to have Louis' warm skin on his. It's been far too long.  
"But it's not," Louis whimpers, "it's not easier. It's harder and I can't do it, Harry, I can't _not_ be with you. I've been with you since the day we met and there's no other way I can see it." He wraps his small arms round Harry's waist suddenly, burying his face into Harry's bare chest.  
"I know, baby, but.. it just takes so much out of me- out of you. I know it hurts you, to have to contain everything." Louis spend a lot of him time hiding who he really was and when he finally came out, in the X Factor, he promised himself that he'd never hide himself again. But then, they signed with Modest and everything got fucked up.  
"I'd do anything 's long as I can be with you," he insists. "And if you still don't want me, it's okay, just.. just hold me, please. One more night, Harry, please. I can't.. can't spend another night alone."  
"Yeah. Yeah, okay. C'mere babe," Harry nods, pulling Louis with him to the hotel bed, sitting at the edge and pulling Louis on his lap, nuzzling into his neck, nosing at the fine hairs there.  
"Can you- can you just like-"  
"Yeah." And Harry pulls back, cups Louis' face in his hands and kisses him, soft and languid and careful, worried that he could slip away at any second. But Louis knows he'll never go anywhere, never be away from Harry because he physically can't. He can't leave this boy's side, no matter how hard he tries.  
Louis pushes at Harry's shoulders until he's laying back against the bed, little hands fisting Harry's overgrown hair as he kisses him, missing the taste of his lips and tongue. It's been too long for them both, considering the longest they were apart before now was two weeks. Other than that, they were inseparable, never leaving each other's side unless they needed to, and even then it was bloody hard. Harry uses his feet to push them back until his head is on the pillows, cupping Louis' thighs to keep him in place, thumbs digging into the fabric covering the flesh.  
"You're so beautiful, Lou," Harry sighs thoughtfully, pulling away looking up at the boy; pink cheeks, puffy eyes and swollen lips. Louis just scoffs and ducks his head, pressing kisses to Harry's neck, sucking hard over the old mark, effectively claiming it as _his_ and not the bird's who left it there.  
"You're mine," Louis says firmly, thumbing at Harry's bare nipples.  
"Yeah," Harry breathes, pulling at the hem of Louis' shirt, lifting it slowly and taking it off and over his head, throwing it to the side.  
"Did you enjoy yourself? With them?" Louis asks, attaching his lips to the other side of his neck, sucking even harder, biting down with purpose.  
"Only got off thinking of you," Harry pants, hands groping at Louis' arse through his sweats, pulling him closer on his lap. "Thought about you sucking me, letting me fuck you the way I want."  
"Yeah?" Louis bites down one last time, making Harry wince slightly.  
"Yeah, baby," Harry's hands move up Louis' sides, thumbs skimming over his pert nipples, making him hiss and push his hips down on Harry's.  
"I love you," Louis says on exhale. And Harry wants to fucking _cry_ because damn, he's needed to hear that. He's needed to hear it ever since Louis shut him out last month, leading up to Harry making things worse for them both. And now that he's said it, Harry doesn't think that there's anything else he'd rather hear than that coming from Louis' mouth.  
"I love you, so much, baby," Harry murmurs against Louis' thin lips, tongue swiping softly over his bottom one. Louis whimpers, grounds his hips down against him harder. Harry suddenly flips them over, pinning Louis beneath him and mouthing at his skin, running his lips across his jawline until they reach his ear.  
"Can I make love to you?" Harry whispers, mimicking the exact words he used the very first night they had sex, back in the house they shared in London in Harry's bedroom, panting and in this exact position.  
"I thought you'd never ask," Louis answers, seeming to catch on because he uses the same words, too, fingers tangling into Harry's curls. They laugh breathlessly, lips touching as they mostly smile at just how bloody _sappy_ they are.  
"Why're we so cute," Louis bumps his nose against Harry's as Harry reaches down and takes the waistband of Louis' sweatpants and pulls down, grinning mischievously when he sees that Louis' got no pants on.  
"Nice," he scoffs, pressing a kiss to the head of Louis' dick, making him squirm as he pulls the fabric off the rest of his legs, kissing as he goes along the warm flesh.  
"Can you _stop_ ," Louis groans, pressing his bare foot to Harry's chest, pushing him away. Harry just wraps his long fingers around Louis' dainty ankle, taking it and pressing soft kisses to his little toes, making Louis giggle.  
"I love your stinky feet, y'know," Harry smiles against the instep of Louis' foot. He wriggles his toes against Harry's face, making them both snicker. And just like that, it feels like the old days; back in their bunk beds at the X Factor house.  
"They're not stinky," Louis pouts, sitting up on his elbows.  
"Oh but they are. 'S alright, baby, they're cute, like you," and with one last kiss to Louis' foot, Harry moves up, mouthing at his calfs and the inside of his meaty thighs. He groans, sucking lightly because he's really missed this; missed a giggly Louis and his soft, sweet skin.  
"Ow," Louis whines, when Harry bites down, pulling back and admiring his handy-work.  
"Hey, don't complain. At least you don't have them on your bloody neck," Harry points to the vivid red marks on his skin and Louis giggles again, pulling Harry down with a tug to his arm.  
"'S just a reminder," he shrugs, kissing him chastely. "Now get to the good stuff, 'm getting bored."  
"Fuck you," Harry laughs, getting off the bed and undoing the belt on his trousers, quickly shucking them and his boxers off so they join the rest of discarded clothing on the floor. He rummages in the pockets, finding a condom in his wallet and an old sachet of lube.  
"Do you just haul that round?" Louis asks.  
"Lube? Yeah, never know when I'm gonna be in a situation like this," Harry smiles.  
"No, a condom," Louis clarifies. "We.. never- haven't used one in forever." Harry notices that his voice has gone quiet and soft and his face falls again, giggly and pink cheeked Louis gone. And then he gets it.  
"No.. it's just- you know," Harry sighs, taking the condom out and tossing it to the bin across the room.  
"You might need that," Louis mumbles, looking down at his toes.  
"Not anymore, baby," Harry says softly, setting the lube down on the bedside table and climbing on top of Louis, bracing himself with his hands on either side of Louis' head. His eyes haven't lifted yet, but his hands come to Harry's bare sides, circling his thumbs into Harry's ribs.  
"Hey," Harry pecks Louis' little nose, making him look up, blue eyes watery at the thought of Harry needing the condom. "I'm sorry. I really am, Lou. But none of those girls were you." Louis lips turn up, just slightly and Harry kisses him chastely.  
"'M sorry I kissed Eleanor," Louis mumbles, "I think it was more of a punishment for me rather than you." His nose scrunches up and Harry chuckles, fingertips lightly tracing up Louis' side.  
"Not sure about that, love."  
And they kiss again, this time with a bit more fever, tongues colliding and massaging and hands _everywhere_. Louis small hand grips Harry's half hard dick, pumping shallowly.  
"I've missed your dick," Louis whines, kissing up Harry's neck to his cheek as Harry breathes out a snort.  
"Just my dick? Not me?" He mocks offence.  
"No, I love your dick more than I love you," Louis says, thumbing over the slit and bubbling precome, making Harry moan softly.  
"I guess it's only fair considering I love your arse more than you," Harry takes a hand and brings it to Louis' bum, squeezing harshly, making Louis' hand movements stutter.  
"Can you just- please," Louis begs when Harry runs a dry finger over his rim.  
"Yeah," Harry breathes, blindly reaching for the sachet of lube and tearing it open with his teeth. "Do yo wanna get on your belly for me, darling?"  
"No," Louis whines, "I want to see you." And just like that, vulnerable Louis is back and it makes Harry remember their fucked up situation. And then realises that yeah, he wants to see Louis, too.  
"Okay, baby, just- like spread your legs, hold them apart, yeah?" Louis nods, opening his legs as wide as they can go, his hole clenching over nothing as his fingers dig into the meatiest part of his thighs. Harry puts a pillow under Louis' hips, hoping to ease any unnecessary discomfort.  
"Harry," Louis whimpers, swallowing hard.  
"I'm here baby," he assures him, pressing a firm kiss to his mouth before resting on his heels between Louis' legs. "I'm gonna lick you, okay? Get you stretched out a bit, yeah?" Louis makes a noise, high in the back of his throat.  
"Fuck. Please," Louis nods. And Harry can't help but notice that he's started crying again, just a few little tears slipping out.  
"Don't cry, Lou," Harry presses a kiss to his left bum cheek, making Louis jump. "I'm gonna make you feel good, okay? Real good, baby, I promise. That sound okay?" Louis just nods, swallowing thickly and repositioning his hands on his legs so they don't slip. Harry nuzzles just above Louis' hole and under his sensitive balls and Louis groans, long and loud.  
And then Harry's tongue is on Louis' most private part, making Louis squeak and his grip on his thighs to falter. Harry lets his tongue prod and poke, gently coaxing him open so he can fit his tongue inside his warmth, lightly running his tongue over Louis' walls. When Louis' grip finally gives out, a hand going to Harry's hair and holding him in place, Harry moans and pulls away, mouthing at Louis' balls.  
"You taste so fucking _good_ , Lou. God, I've missed you," he pants, positioning his body so his dick is trapped between his belly and the mattress.  
"Ha-Harry," he hiccups, tensing when he feels a wet, slimy finger prod at his entrance.  
"Relax," Harry says, leaning up and taking Louis' dick in his mouth, momentarily distracting him enough to slip his pointer finger inside.  
" _God_ ," Louis groans. He feels incredibly tight around Harry's finger, so tight that Harry has to wriggle his finger round, just to get him loose enough to pull back out.  
"You're so tight, Lou," Harry sighs, licking around Louis' hole.  
"Haven't touched myself," Louis gets out, wincing slightly when Harry pulls out and pushes back in.  
"Since..?"  
"Yeah."  
"Christ, baby, that's so-" Harry swallows, attempting and failing at slipping another finger in, "that's so hot. You're so hot, Louis. So fucking hot, I love you so much."  
"C'mon get on with it," Louis shoves his hips back to Harry's finger, "do another, I can take it."  
"Don't want to hurt you," Harry shakes his head.  
"I'm ok. Please, Harry," Louis whines, tugging at Harry's hair. He sighs, taking the sachet of lube and putting a little more on his second finger, rubbing over his abused hole before tucking it in, rubbing a hand up and down Louis' thigh, going to his hip and digging his thumb into the divot there.  
"This okay?"  
"Yeah," Louis sighs. Harry circles his fingers, loosening him up enough to thrust them in and out, mouth watering when he sees Louis' dick jump. Harry's never seen anyone as beautiful as Louis. And when Harry curls his fingers, just a little bit, Louis cries out so loud he's sure the boys all the way across the hall can hear.  
"There?" Harry asks, though he already knows.  
" _Yes_ ," Louis hisses as Harry massages the little bump inside him, pushing and prodding and poking against it, making Louis cry even harder.  
"One more?" Harry asks, licking around the fingers tucked into Louis' arse, stretching him out just a little more. Louis just nods and Harry pushes a third in, groaning at the tight heat around his fingers, pausing when he hears Louis let out a whimper of discomfort rather than in pleasure.  
"Want to just get off like this? I can just have a wank if it's too much, baby," Harry says quietly, rutting slightly against the mattress.  
"No," Louis whines, "no, just a little more and I'll be okay. I want you."  
"You sure?"  
"Yes, Harry," Louis says in exasperation, impatiently grinding his arse down. Harry just laughs a little bit and thrusts his fingers in and out, the resistance letting up with every push, avoiding the spot inside of him.  
After a few more minutes of pushing, Louis gives a shaky sigh and reaches down, gripping Harry's wrist.  
"'M ready," he says quietly, "I'm good." Harry frowns, gently easing his fingers out and wiping them carelessly on the sheets at his sides and then crawls up Louis' body, kissing him on the mouth lazily.  
"Are you sure, love? I can just suck you off, put my fingers inside you again," Harry offers, willing to just forget about his hard, aching dick just to avoid hurting Louis.  
"Just get _in_ me, Harry, God," he breathes, hand fumbling around for the sachet of lube and giving it to Harry.  
"Okay. But if it's too much-"  
"You act like I've never had your dick up my arse, Harry," Louis rolls his eyes fondly. Harry just gives him a quick kiss and then pours the rest of the lube on his dick, wrapping a hand around himself to spread it all over, using a slimy hand to rub over Louis' hole, making him jump.  
"You're so beautiful," Harry says again, using one hand to hold his weight up and the other to guide his throbbing dick to Louis' hole.  
"You're not so bad yourself," Louis pinches Harry's nipple.  
"I mean it, though, baby. You're the most beautiful person in the entire world."  
"You've already got me naked and had your fingers in my bum, enough flattery."  
"Can you just accept the damn compliment?" Harry frowns.  
"Christ, thank you," he rolls his eyes again, "now please, get on with it."  
So Harry does, spreading Louis' arse cheeks apart so the tip of his dick catches on Louis' rim. And when Harry finds it in him to push in, inch by fucking inch, Louis' eyes flutter closed as the most beautiful sound is ripped from his throat as his hand reaches for Harry's free one, lacing their fingers together as Harry's balls are flush against Louis' bum.  
"Jesus," Harry groans. "Are you okay?"  
"Hurts," Louis whimpers, a tear falling down his cheek. Harry catches it with his tongue, pressing a kiss to his heated skin afterward.  
"Want me to pull out? I can suck you, baby, it's alright," Harry rubs his nose against his.  
"No, Harry, please just.. stay. I'm okay. I need you," he says, squeezing his hand tighter, legs coming up and wrapping them around Harry's waist, crossing his ankles at the base of his spine.  
"Tell me when," is all Harry says. He just keeps pressing soft kisses to his skin, reaching a hand between them to take Louis in his hand, pumping him with a tight fist to get him hard again.  
"Stop touching," Louis grumbles, prying Harry's hand off him. "You can move. I'm good."  
"Yeah?"  
"Yeah."  
Harry pulls back and pushes back in slowly, watching in awe as Louis' eyes roll back in his head, craning his neck and giving Harry the opportunity to suck a love bite right into his pulse point, sinking his teeth in and then running his tongue over the throbbing bruise.  
"Dick," Louis laughs breathlessly.  
"You're mine," Harry shrugs, continuing with the movements of his hips, keeping his pace slow in case Louis decided to pull the trigger. But he doesn't, and after a while, Harry loses his self control, snapping his hips forward harshly, making Louis groan.  
"Just like that, baby," he sighs, pushing his heels into Harry's arse, urging him forward.  
"Yeah? That's how you want it?" Harry challenges, his voice an octave lower than usual.  
"That's how I want it," Louis agrees, opening his eyes and looking up at Harry with a small smirk. "You gonna give it to me, big boy?" Harry fucking moans.  
"Fuck yes I'm gonna give it to you," and he does, he really does. His hips snap forward harshly, shaking the entire bed with the force of it. He even has to bring a free hand up to Louis' shoulder, holding him in place so his head doesn't bang on the headboard behind them.  
"Shit," Louis curses, eyes fluttering closed again as he just takes it; takes it like he's been getting it everyday for the last month and half. It's something Louis' always been good at; taking Harry like he was fucking made for it. And really, he thinks he was.  
"You're so bloody tight, Louis. Love that nothing's been up your arse since I was," Harry pants, leaning down and pressing hips lips to Louis' tongue immediately darting into his mouth.  
"Harder," Louis demands, digging his fingernails into the skin on Harry's back, hard enough to break skin. And by the incredibly hot look that overcomes Harry's face, he's pretty sure it does. "I want it to hurt tomorrow."  
"Yeah? You wanna feel me tomorrow when we're on stage? Remember that I was inside you?" Harry thrusts in so hard, Louis loses his breath.  
" _Please_ ," he cries quietly.  
"God, I love you," Harry grunts, hips erratic; the sound of skin slapping against skin and Louis' loud moans and Harry's continuous groans the only sounds filling the room. And they know they're being carelessly loud, but they really don't even care, it's been too long. They haven't been this close in months and it's breathtaking for them both to keep eye contact as they do the most intimate thing they can.  
"Love you," Louis swallows, head going back on the pillows with a particularly loud shout as Harry changes his angle. "Right fucking there, Harry, please."  
"You gonna come?" Harry pants, squeezing both of Louis' hands in his now, holding them by his head.  
"Yeah, 'm gonna come," Louis is crying again, harder this time, shaking with sobs and with Harry's aggressive thrusts.  
"Come on baby, come. You're gonna look so fucking hot when you come, Louis, I know it. You gonna let me see?" Harry doesn't lose the rhythm of his hips.  
"Yeah, Christ I love you. I fuckin' love you Harry, oh- oh shit-" and Harry pulls back just in time to see Louis' dick twitch at then spurt out so much come; landing on both their chests and Louis screams out, loud and long and so fucking hot that Harry loses it, grumbling something along the lines of "so beautiful" and "love you so much" as he comes inside Louis, head dropping to his shoulder, teeth sinking harshly into the flesh as he waits for both of their breathing to calm.  
They stay like that for as long as they can; until Harry's soft dick is too uncomfortable inside Louis' sensitive arse. When he pulls out, Louis heaves out a sob, clutching at his stomach as he legs curl up as he cries, hard.  
"Hey, shh," Harry frowns, "don't cry, baby. 'M right here, 'm not going anywhere." And as tired Harry is, he gathers up all his strength to lean down and press soft kisses to Louis' belly, getting to the pool of come and letting his tongue dart out and lick it all up, making Louis' breath hitch as he cries some more. Harry grabs his shirt from the edge of the bed, cleaning up the mess coming out of Louis' arse as best as he can, murmuring little apologies about the mess, but he's not sure if Louis can even hear him.  
"C'mere," Harry coos, gathering Louis in his arms and lifting the blankets under him, setting his body down on the clean sheets and pulling the duvet over him, going in behind him and pulling his spent body flush to his.  
"Don't cry, beautiful," Harry whispers into Louis' ear, making him shiver.  
"'M sorry, it's just.. please don't leave me," Louis sobs. "I know I said one more night.. but please. Don't go, Harry, please."  
"Baby, I'm not going anywhere," Harry assures him.  
"You don't want me anymore," Louis whimpers, turning around in Harry's arms and shoving his face into his neck.  
"Don't say that. I do want you, I'll want you for as long as I live, Lou, you know that," Harry reminds him. "And I know what I said earlier.. but you're right. It's not easy, hiding who we are.. but I'd rather be able to hold you at night when the going gets rough than not at all."  
Harry lets himself cry again, holding Louis tighter against him. And he really doesn't mind that they're going to be sticky and dirty in the morning, doesn't mind that tomorrow when they tell the boys and the team gets the hint, that they're going to be told what to do and who to look at and when to look somewhere else. But for the first time in a while, Harry doesn't mind one bit because right now, with Louis clinging to him like his life depends on it and Harry holding him like he could slip away, he doesn't think there's anywhere else he'd rather be because Louis is his soul mate, always has been and always will be. And because of that, Harry's willing to wait as long as they have to, stick it out because it's is worth it. _Louis_ is worth it.  
"I love you," Louis whispers. And it's like their first time back in their old house in London again; Louis cuddled in his chest when he finally mutters the words that've have been stuck at the tip of his tongue for months.  
"I love you," Harry says back, closing his eyes contentedly because he's finally got his boy in his arms again and all the other shit really doesn't seem to matter.


End file.
